8 Most Annoying Things of 2008

Wow, am I glad this year is over! From an exhausting and mentally draining election season, to economic collapse and dire predictions of doom and gloom, I'm surprised more people haven't resorted to a snack of "gun barrel ala mode".

I'm hoping that 2009 will be a year when we can get our country back on track. Of course, with a Ultra-Liberal Far Left President and the usual Gang Of Crooks in Congress, that is a pipe dream at best.

But my post is about the most annoying things of 2008. I am going to leave politics aside momentarily and bitch and whine about the pop cultural oddities that drive me up the wall.

So here goes in no particular order:



YOUTUBE - When did we all become little Steven Speilbergs? Now any scrub with a camera phone can put his mug on the Internet for his 15 minutes of fame.

The networks are relying more and more on this site too, have you noticed? No more professional cameramen, just a YouTuber catching a Congressman picking his nose and Voila! you have the evening newscast!

*BONUS POINTS* Naked girls dancing in the their bedrooms ( NOT annoying!)



VAMPIRE CULTURE - From the Twilight books and movie to HBO's Trueblood, everything vampire was in this year. I'm not sure what the attraction is, but if bloodsucking is what you are all about, try watching the bailout hearings on C-SPAN.

If you get a chance, check out South Park's take on this phenomenom. It's a classic!
*BONUS POINTS* Naked vampire chicks!

HOLOGRAMS - CNN executive: "Wolf, we have this great new technology to try on your show. We're going to have a hologram of Jessica Yellen right on stage with you! You will be able to talk to her and she can answer you and give you election results just like she was in the studio with you."

Wolf Blitzer: " Why don't you just put her in the studio with me?"

CNN executive: " Uh..remember the restraining order Wolf?"

Wolf: " Oh yeah....well, can I at least nail the hologram?"
CNN executive: " Uh...no"


CELEBRITY SUNGLASSES - I am against following celebrity fashion trends anyway, but this one takes the cake.

Why do these faux stars feel the need to wear sunglasses with lenses the size of pork chops? Is it because their diet of cocaine and Tic-Tacs that result in skeletal bodies demand something that mimics skull-like eye sockets?

Or maybe their baby's daddys got a little free with the fists last night. Either way, time for this trend to go the way of peasant dresses and corn rows.

MUSICALS- the biggest offender of course is High School Musical and all of it's rancid sequels. There is a reason musicals aren't made anymore.....THEY SUCK!!

Just a peek at MAMA MIA and the hag-like Meryl Streep bouncing around with a effeminate Pierce Brosnan is enough to make your eyeballs bleed and to cause curvature of the spine.

Let's face it, there hasn't been a good musical since Sound of Music, so let this genre die a quick death, OK?

SOCIAL NETWORK SITES - Facebook, MySpace, Netlog, Friendster, whatever you want to call them, this is yet another example of the polarization of society. We don't need to actually go and meet people, we can interact online. We don't need real friends, we have virtual friends. We don't need to really have sex, we can have cyber-sex.

When a teen girl hangs herself because a 40ish woman poses as a boy and "virtual" breaks up with the girl, it's time to close up shop on this kinda crap. Do me a favor, crawl out of your Mom's basement and get out in the real world people! On second thought, maybe some of you should stay down there.

*DISCLAIMER* I blog on this site and also have a page on DeviantArt ( an art sharing website ), both of which can be considered social networking sites.

However, I still have and maintain flesh and blood contact with reality.

CELEBRITY SHOWS -Are we that vacuous in this country that our entertainment consists of watching 'so-called' celebrities doing everything from dancing to cooking to getting therapy? God, this one really steams me!!

If you are one of these 'so-called' celebrities and you find yourself on one of these shows, you know that: A. You are a very minor celeb and this might help your career, but probably not,( think Daniel Baldwin ) or B. You were a fairly big name at one time and this is the only kind of crap you get offered now , ( think Bruce Jenner ) or C. you are a freak that gets trotted out to increase the 'car wreck' effect, ( think porn star Ron Jeremy )




PRODUCT HAWKERS - " Hi, Billy Mays here for * fill in name of piece of crap you would never normally buy * and I'm here to show you how you can * do something you don't need to do anyway* all for the low, low price of * whatever the price, it's going to involve 5 easy payments, I guarantee ya* !

Or... " Hi, I'm Vince from ShamWOW, and I've got 45 seconds to convince you to pay almost $20 for a huge chunk of felt that could be bought at any fabric store for about $1.29. Oh, did I mention it's made in Germany?"

*SCARY THOUGHT ALERT* Listen long and often enough, and you WILL buy...oh yes, you will buy.

Well, I'll stop at these 8 things, but I would like to hear what annoyed YOU the most about 2008. Leave a comment or email me and I will post them for all the world to see next week!

Until then Dear Reader, have a safe and happy New Year!

America's Poor

It's Christmas time again and after all the hectic shopping and running around I do at this time of year, I usually have a few thoughts about what charitable thing I can do to make the holidays a little less "commercialized" for me.
The usual ideas occurred to me; giving to the Salvation Army, donating to the local homeless shelter, etc., etc.
I was starting to feel all warm and fuzzy, thinking how I could help some poor family have a better Christmas when.....
I went to the local convenience store and got behind The Enormously Fat Lady(TEFL ).
TEFL was evidently feeling lucky that day, as she was buying at least 20 scratch-off lottery tickets. And just as evident was her desire to feel warm and fuzzy, because she also was buying not one, but two 24 oz. bottles of that ol' Christmas stand-by...Colt 45 Malt Liquor.
Now far be it from me to begrudge anyone who likes a nip now and then and who likes to gamble from pursuing their dreams, but it was what the cashier told me after she sacked up TEFL's lottery tickets (that's right, she had to sack them up!) that made my blood boil.
The cashier told me that she volunteers at the local Good Samaritan Center in town and that this particular EFL was there on a weekly basis, getting food for her family, clothes and even a small cash stipend for gas. And was sometimes belligerent when funds weren't available.
The cashier also told me that not only was TEFL a regular at the Good Samaritan Center, she was also a regular at the convenience store, and that her purchases were ALWAYS malt liquor and lottery tickets and cigarettes.
Now I am sure that there are needy people in our country, but it occurs to me that American poor have it better than any poor people in the world. I would wager that most people receiving taxpayer funded assistance have not only a TV, but cable to boot. They probably have a car, maybe not a newer one, but a car nonetheless.And the kids probably have some kind of video game system.
But they get reduced lunches, and SNAP (food stamps), and TANF(welfare), and SSI, and WIC, and a slew of other acronyms that you and I pay for.
I am sick of my hard earned dollars supporting these dead beats and leeches. I say that if you are able-bodied enough to walk down to the store to buy lottery tickets and booze, you're able to work.
Lest you think I am Scrooge and would like to see " the surplus population decreased", I really would like to help out my fellow man in need, I just think that in most cases the need is exaggerated. And that some, if not most, of the "poor" we have in this country are a lot like TEFL.
So as you go about your Christmas activities, and you have the need to feel all "warm and fuzzy", be careful of who you donate to.
Check with your church or synagogue. They might have a better handle on truly deserving people.
And if you can't find anyone to be the recipient of your charity, I know a certain blogger that's feeling lucky!
Merry Christmas Dear Reader!

p.s. Thanks to Steve and Dan for responding to the last post. It's nice to know someone is reading. A special thanks to Steve for forwarding it on....it's really nice to know strangers are reading my posts.

CUSTOMER SERVICE: R.I.P.

Christmas always highlights my biggest pet peeve.....crappy customer service. I mean, I bitch about it to my family all year long, but at Christmas it really ticks me off.

When did customer service die? I remember it from my childhood. I practiced it in my teen years and later, when I worked retail. Did the big corporations have some kind of Bilderberg Conference to eliminate it?

Shitty customer service manifests itself in a myriad of ways.

1. When did dumping your change in a pile into your hand become O.K.? You have to use your free hand, scoop the change off of the bills, put the coins into your front pocket, then put the bills in your wallet. A BIG PAIN IN THE ASS! *New Twist* Now they are putting your receipt on top of the coins! Shit! Now I have a coin sandwich!

2. Number One became commonplace because of Number Two....namely, no one counts back your change properly, i.e. counting coins up to the nearest dollar, then count bills up to the amount tendered. No, if the computer doesn't tell the cashier how much you are to receive in change, they are lost. Literally. If you are ever bored and feeling mean-spirited, as I frequently am, try this little trick; Buy something that totals...say $10.32. Hand the cashier a $20 bill. After they have punched the appropriate buttons and start to hand your change to you (in a big pile), say " Oh wait a tic...here's two quarters" The look you will receive will remind you of Jack Nicholson right after his ice pick lobotomy. They literally have to close the drawer and start over. I almost had a girl at McDonalds cry.

I also once had a cashier make a stab at counting change back to me, but it went something like this..." and 5, 12, 18, 46, 103..er...blue, 97, uh...makes $10" I give her credit though. It sounded good.

3. Is greeting the customer and wishing them a good day also verboten in this Brave New World?

Is a sullen look the new "How do you do?" I mean, I wish they would just come out and say " Fuck you, I hate my job and I would rather piss on you than wait on you" At least then you would have a conversation starter.

4. Could we get some help at Home Depot? Huh? I always get the skate punk kid who looks like he's just a few bong hits away from total Nirvana helping me. "Uh, wax rings? Yeah dude, I think they're up with the candles by the registers man"

*FUN TRICK* Ask him if they sell dovetail joints and watch his eyes light up like a kid at Christmas!

5. Finally, and I think the Evil Wal-Mart started this trend, after I'm done shopping and have gone through the register, do you have to check my receipt and bags as I'm going out the door?

I mean, Christ, I just walked 10 feet from the register to the front door...what could I have stolen? Some crappy ChapStik? The free Apartment Guide?

Hell, next they will be wanting me to submit to a full anal cavity search. "See anything in there ya like pal?"

So if you work retail, you are doing a vital job in our Great Society and believe me, I appreciate it. So smile and be cheerful and I will reciprocate

But be a dick and I swear...next time I'm paying in pennies!

An Break-Up Letter To Hollywood

Hey Hollywood, let me start out by saying I really like movies and TV. Hell, I was raised on TV.

Just the thought of Bewitched or Gilligan's Island or the Munsters will bring a nostalgic smile to my face.

And along with the TV shows and movies, the actors that portrayed the roles I have come to love have at times seemd liked old friends. I mean, I was never so deluded as to think that the actors were the characters, but still, ya gotta figure Don Knotts was a little like Barney, right?

Actors have a tough job. I know, I know, people will probably be screaming right now " Tough? Hell, all they have to do is pretend to be someone else. How tough is that?"

Well, it is tough to act and it requires quite a bit of creativity to do it. You have to put the real world out of your mind and totally immerse yourself in a fantasy world of your own making.

And this is EXACTLY why most of you are EXTREME LIBERALS. That is the requirement to be a Liberal. Liberals always will live in a fantasy world of their own making, bearing no resemblance to the real world the rest of us inhabit.

And you know what? THAT'S...O.K.!! I want my actors in the fantasy world, that's where they do the most for our society, giving the rest of us a little escape from the real world, if only for a couple of hours.

What I DON'T WANT is actors intruding on the real world by spewing their fantasy world opinions about politics!

I can't help it. After this past election season, seeing all you pompous actors foisting your Ultra-Liberal agenda onto the masses and having the brainless among us lap it up like so much ambrosia from the gods, I can't watch you anymore!

No more Late Night with David Letterman, no more Daily Show, no more movies with the following actors; Sean Penn, George Clooney, Dustin Hoffman, Danny DeVito, Ed Norton and on and on and on.....

This pains me Hollywood. It really does.

This means no more watching 'Christmas Vacation' because Chevy Chase ruined it for me with his venomous attacks on our sitting President.

This means not watching '30 Rock', a perfectly funny show, because the Liberal Dream Team of Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin make my skin crawl.

Hell, I can't even watch old reruns of 'All In The Family' or the 'Mary Tyler Moore Show' because I see Rob Reiner and Ed Asner and just know that they are helping in the downfall of the country I love.

Like pining for a lost lover, I sometimes wish that you were like the Hollywood of old.

The World War II Hollywood that promoted the American Way for all to see.

(including all those foreigners who would later come to this great country, based on what they saw in the movies)

But your not that Hollywood anymore, so this affair is over.

I guess I'll have to do something else now...like read a book.

Now there's an idea.

Some Thoughts From the Deep Recesses of My Mind

Just some stuff I want to put out there. Feel free to agree or disagree. Better yet, start a discussion with someone you know with opposing viewpoints. Tell them " Hey, I was reading this idiot's (genius's) blog, and he said...."
One of the worst thing to come from unbridled Liberalism is the hesitancy to discuss so-called "sensitive" issues. Discussion breeds enlightenment.
Here goes:

MEDIA - The Mainstream Media is biased. Boycott every news outlet that will not present a balanced view. If that fails, turn them off.

RACISM - It exists. Some whites hate blacks and browns and yellows. Some blacks hate whites and browns and yellows. Some browns hate...yada, yada, yada. Racism has been around ever since man has been around. Deal with it, but fer God's sake, quit blaming it for all your troubles.
Barak Hussein Obama is now our President. I never, ever want to hear again that "the Man" is keeping you down. The Man is now black.

AIDS - No matter what the Mainstream Media says, AIDS is primarily a gay and intravenous drug user disease. The great heterosexual plague of AIDS never materialized mainly because AIDS is only prevalent in high risk groups. I feel for them and wish them well, but behavior has it's consequences.

ABORTION - It's wrong. We all know that but try to find rationalizations for it anyway. See the egg...it's just an egg. See the spermatazoa, it's just a spermatazoa. But put them together, they make a human...immediately...so let's not kill it, ok?

GUNS - "Guns don't kill people, people kill people" is not only a great bumper sticker, it's also one of life's great truisms. Just look at Great Britain if you don't believe me...since instituting an almost total gun ban, now their rates of knife murders has skyrocketed!
If you need to drive a nail and you don't have a hammer, you use a Crescent wrench. You don't leave the nail undriven, right?
If you want to hurt someone, the lack of automatic weapons won't stop you. But it will damn sure keep you from defending yourself from someone who DOES have a gun.
Buy guns. Learn to use them responsibly. Sleep well at night.

IMMIGRATION - Wanna come to the land of opportunity? Great. Sign up, do it legally, learn our language and customs and fuckin' assimilate, ok? Millions of immigrants did it this way and they ended up as important additions to our great country.
If we wanted to celebrate Ramadan, or speak Spanish or obey Shariah law, then we would move to your country.

DRUGS - We should legalize 'em. WOW, bet you didn't think a conservative would say that, did ya? Let me qualify that statement. Prohibition of drugs has the same effects as prohibition of alcohol did 80 years ago. It's a failed experiment and everyone knows it. Legalize it, control the sales and access and tax it. It would instantly wipe out the majority of gangs, violence and empty our prisons of non-violent offenders and free up room for scumbag child molesters and rapists.
BONUS: the taxes it would generate would wipe-out the Federal deficit.

PUBLIC SCHOOLS - They're broken beyond repair. Our school system today is a bastion of Far left indoctrination and are a great danger to our way of life. They teach your kids nothing about the subjects that matter, and a whole lot of propaganda that will warp their little minds. Avoid public schools at all costs.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS - THE Greatest Danger To Us All!!! More than terrorism, more than disease, more than nuclear war, more than anything, PC threatens the very fiber of our nation by making us a nation of cowering, weak pussies! Afraid to offend. Afraid to speak your mind. Afraid, afraid, afraid. Stand up and be un-PC today! Call a bum a bum. Fly a Confederate flag. Smoke a cigarette in public. Take a stand...TODAY!

PRO SPORTS - Ought to be abolished if they can't get their shit together. All the lofty ideals of sports.... teamwork, good sportsmanship, respect, humility, etc. get thrown out the window when it turns professional. Just look at the collection of thugs and louts we have today. Wanna have fun at a sporting event? Go see your local High School football team play on a Friday night.

Well, far from being all that I have to say, this is but a smattering. I will post more later, but until then.... keep chugging. It's people like you, Dear Reader, who will turn this slide into madness around. I have faith in you.

I'm Baaaaaaack!................

As you can tell from the date, it has been a while since I posted anything.

We lost the election and BHO is our president-elect. Words cannot express how disappointed I am in the American electorate right now. I will however honor my promise in a previous post to refrain from name calling BHO or disrespecting him as our President. He is our President and as such commands our respect for his office. This is completely opposite of the way the Far Left treated George W. for the past 8 years. We, as Conservatives, need to set a better example.

I am urging all of you to refrain from disrespecting BHO for the duration of his term. That DOES NOT mean that we can't criticize his policies, appointments or decisions on valid grounds though. THAT is our duty!

And I will be willing to give props to BHO when he does something productive for our country, such as keeping Robert Gates as Defense Sec.

Having said that, that decision was almost instantly nullified by the ridiculous decision to appoint HRC as Sec. of State. What the hell is he thinking? Doesn't he know she will subvert his authority at every turn? His habit of appointing not only Clintonistas but Clinton herself tells me he is not very confident in himself or his cronies.

Anyway, America will survive, if only because of people like you, Dear Reader. We just need to mobilize and quit sitting on the side lines.

Your homework tonight: Find out who your state Senators andRepresentatives are, write down their email and phone numbers and write or call when you have a concern. Don't wait "for someone else" to do it....YOU DO IT!

Until later.....